The Glass Castle: Memoir Connections

The earliest memory I have is when I was about four. It was summer and my family and a bunch of our family friends were at Minot beach in Scituate, MA. The other families had kids older than me. My older sister was 6 and there were other kids 7 or 8. I would always try to keep up with them. That day all the big kids were playing on giant rock that I wasnt allowed to go on. All I got to do was play in the little tide pool next to it. Anyways I guess someone fell and got a big gash on his leg after he slipped and fell on a crack in the rock. The lifeguard and parents were rushing to help him. I obviously was intrigued, so I ran over to the side of the huge forbidden rock and, like any other curious four year old, I started to climb up the side. Eveyone was preoccupied worried about the boy's bleeding cut that at first nobody noticed me. I was pretty high off the ground and I felt unstoppable. But my adventure was cut short when my mom's friend Martha grabbed me off the rock and started firmly telling me not to do that ever again. I was furiously embarrassed, she wasn't my mother and she had no right telling me what to do. Now the crowd was looking at me as u got yelled at. My pale irish skin on my face soon turned bright red. I wiggled my way out of Martha's arms and ran to my momther who was waiting to do her share of scolding. That night, as I was getting ready for a bath, I started crying because I wasn't a big kid and I was being held back because of it. 

When I asked to think about my first memory I can remember how I felt about it then but also look at in a new light and a new understanding. Looking back on that day I realize that Martha and my mom were only looking out for me. I have a lot of young cousins and when I'm with them I'm always watching them making sure they aren't doing anything dangerous. At age four I don't think I was thinking about the danger of what I was doing rather than the adventure and the thrill. I have always been a Curious George but back then I didn't know when I should and shouldn't poke my nose into things. 

 

The Glass Castle: Lost Hope & Perseverance

When the Walls first reached Welch, West Virginia its poverty and run down look didn't effect them because they were used to a poor lifestyle. But one thing about welch was different. The whole town seemed lost, everything and everyone was old and worn and stuck in their ways. This is referring to the racial tensions between the black and white communities in the town. Erma (Rex's mother) specifically was extremely racist which was a change for the Walls children because all their life they were taught to accept all people. Along with this racism and the physical state of the town which caused loss of hope for Jeanette, one could argue that Jeanette's hope was lost before she ever got to Welch. In the beginning of the chapter she talks about the trip to West Virginia unlike she did any other trip or "adventure". Jeanette told the story of the move almost in a aggravated way. This aggravation shows that Jeanette started to think differently of the life she was living. She was losing hope of her family settling down and being a regular family. Once she actually reached Welch, the town reflected her own personal feelings of being run down and tired, tired of going with the flow and rising to the occasion. 

In third grade I started playing lacrosse. In fifth grade I started playing at a higher level, on a club team called mass elite. They are one of the best youth club lacrosse teams on the east coast. I had made the team 2 years in a row. But during tryouts in seventh grade I was cut from the program. A couple of days after I got cut, the head coach called me explaining why they made this decision. I didn't want to hear it. Lacrosse meant so much to me, and it was a big part of my social life. I was worried about how others would see me because now I'm not as good as everyone else. I no longer had the identity of being one of the top teams in the country. This really effected my confidence and for a while I didn't want to have anything to do with the sport. Over time I began to realize how much I missed it, that I can't let one person tell me what I can or cannot do. That fall I tried out for a different club team and made it, and am still part of this team. Ever since I decided to persevere and continue doing what I love, I've regained some of that confidence. Lack of confidence and the ability to have it in yourself is something I always will need to work on. But one thing I've learned is that you can't let one person stop you from doing the things that make you happy and make you a better version of yourself. Lacrosse and my athleticism is one part of me and I learned how to persevere even when this part of me became a little broken or lost along the way. 

The Glass Castle: Forced Outside comfort zone

1) As Jeannette is growing up and learning new things about herself and the environment around her things start to appear different to her. For example, Billy Deel was Jeanette's neighbor in Battle Mountain. He was three years older than her. Jeannette talked about how early into their "friendship" or aqua intense Billy forced his company on Jeannette as he started referring to them as boyfriend and girlfriend. Jeanette repeatedly told him that this was not true nor did she want it to be. It was all playful until Billy started to pursue Jeanette more forcefully. He kissed Jeanette and when she tried to pull away he kept forcing himself upon her. She ran away and denied the situation. Jeannette became uncomfortable being in Billy's presence due to the fact that he pushed so far out of her comfort zone that she saw it as affecting her safety even though she didn't quite understand what was going on. Jeanette was only 7 years old. This experience, I think, taught Jeanette that it is okay to do "No" and sometimes you  have too. This also may have changed Jeanette's whole view of men in general as she realized that they aren't all innocent and worthy of forgiveness. 

2) Up until my freshman year of high school I attended catholic schools, located outside of my town. Each grade had a population of only about 25 or less students. I was comfortable in small groups, I had gotten used to it. In 9th grade there was about 200 students in the grade. I hadn't ever gone to public school, but knew some kids from youth sports. Going into the first day I was nervous and scared that I was going to be seen as the weird new girl. But I found that I rose to the occasion and discovered that I don't have to be shy and I don't have to hide in the crowd. I began making friends, speaking out on class, and embrassing my true personality. I was happy. By stepping out of my shell I found a person that I liked way more than the person I thought I had to be in order to fit in. High school isn't always easy but I've found that being yourself, your true self, can really make  a difference. That sounds cliche but it's true. Those first couple days I held myself back because I was nervous about people's opinions. But what I found was that being yourself and expressing yourself is much more rewarding than pretending to be, for me, quiet and shy because most of the time I am neither of these things. I'm happy that the people who care about me and are my friends have accepted me after I let myself out of my comfort zone.